Introduction

In May 2004, Elle Macpherson arrived in Sydney to an unprecedented flurry of media excitement. Although being the centre of attention isn’t exactly a new experience for Australia’s most famous supermodel, on this occasion the reason behind the furore was a little different. Every journalist within spitting distance of “The Body” had a single, pressing question: “So what’s it like to be forty?” Macpherson had hit the big 4-0 two months earlier, and speaking to the media - looking exquisite in ways most women can only dream of - she gave them her spin on things: “It’s not scary at all,” she said. “I feel better than I ever felt. I don’t think turning forty these days has the same connotation that it did generations ago. The alternative is not turning forty, and what would that mean?”

Turning 40 is regarded by many people as a key milestone in a person’s life. Some psychobabblers have dubbed it the launch pad for a mid-life crisis, while others see it as a time to do some soul searching about the meaning of life, the world, and your role in it. But in today’s world, what turning 40 truly means is trickier to define than it used to be - especially if you’re a woman. In days gone by it meant slowing down, emptying your nest, and lamenting the passing of your youth. But today, many fortysomething women are just as likely to be marrying for the first time, starting a family, launching their own business, or getting that top job in a major international corporation.

I hit the big 4-0 six months before Elle Macpherson, and at the time I didn’t really think much of it. After all, it’s not like you turn 40 and everything changes the very next day - nothing falls off, expires, or stops working just like that! But the fuss surrounding Macpherson’s big birthday got me thinking about what it’s really like to be a fortysomething woman today, so I decided to explore a number of important areas of life, and which I felt may have changed over the years: health, sex, babies, careers and fashion among them. Then I wrote a major article on the subject for a leading Australian health magazine, and the feedback I got from people who read it was not only positive, but also insightful. What was clear is that many women disagree with the “over the hill moniker” with which our age group has been traditionally labelled. Rather than slowing down, in fact, many of us are cranking up our lives for a second innings.

The truth is that from the day we are born we start to age. The only difference is that we don’t associate ageing with a curious toddler, a temperamental teen, or a twentysomething launching herself into the world at large. For reasons dictated by society, and the media, we have been conditioned to start thinking about the concept of ageing after our thirtieth birthday. And by the time we hit the big 4-0, many of us think we are over the hill - and from there it’s all downhill. Today, I am smack in the middle of my forties, and of the many things I’ve learned in the past five years, an important one is that being a fortysomething has its challenges. Just as there are “tweenies” - kids who are no longer toddlers, but are also not quite teens - the forties is a period of life where you find yourself a tad “in between”.

There’s an old French proverb which says: “Forty is the old age of youth; fifty is the youth of old age”. It’s true that as a fortysomething you are certainly not a girlish young woman anymore, but equally you are still a long way from having matronly grace. So what happens in that in-between decade? When the American singer, Melissa Etheridge, turned 40 in 2001 she told the media: “It wasn't quite so much, ‘Oh, hey I’m turning 40.’ It was more, ‘Ok, I’m 40 and look, I have a brand new life.’” As I’ve discovered, she is spot on. Entering this stage of life undoubtedly presents a woman with dilemmas, from what to wear to look good at one end of the scale, to health concerns which can surface at this age at the other. But becoming a fortysomething also presents us with a fabulous opportunity to take a leaf from Madonna’s book, and reinvent ourselves - and our lives.

That magazine article I wrote five years ago provided the inspiration to write this book, and it has given me the opportunity to explore more areas of life which are important to all women, and which can evolve into a state of flux in the forties. Rather than being a “must-do” book, however, I prefer to think of it as a “how-to-if-you-want-to” guide. One of the great things about being a fortysomething is that, by now, you will likely know what you like and dislike in life, and don’t care what other people think either way. But if you are wondering about fighting the signs of ageing, having a late baby, or planning for retirement, I have interviewed a group of highly respected experts from Australia, the USA and the UK, to get the best advice and information to help fortysomething woman to become the best they can be.

As I started writing this book, I saw a cute fridge magnet in a store which read: “If life begins at 40, what are the years 0-39? A rehearsal?” Whatever your spin on things, the forties doesn’t have to be a “lost” decade, or a time of life to long for days gone by. In fact, it’s a magnificent opportunity to take life by the horns and be fabulous - the rehearsals are over, and it’s time for the main act.